6yrs

so im just gonna get to the point;
i have suffered from anerxia and bulima
in 7th grade i started starving myself. i was big for my age. i was 148 at 12 yrs old. it worked so i kept it up i would stop when i reched my goal and start when i felt bad again. i eventually got caught by my mom. i stoped for about 4 months. but i started gaining weghit again. so i would not eat breakfast or lunch come home and eat a little dinner. my weight has always been up and down since. i try to stop but when i gain a cuple pounds i start agin. about freshman year i decided to try throwing up. it was (strangly) very up lifting. i felt in control agin and that this was my awnser. so now i could eat with my family or go out with my friends and not feel bad about it. cause about 20 mins later i would be okay. i have been caught . it was this year and i am a junier now. but i keep doin it . im trying to quit. i havent thrown up in about 5 days. and before that it was 4. so im slowing down. im trying to watch what i eat.but i still feel myself get those cravings and ill start to eat everything. i also have nervous eating. where i eat when im bored mad sad scared, anything. so i wont notice im doning it untill i have gone through half the refridgerator. and then i can find no other way. i have been trying to get a handle on this but because its been so long its takin a toll on my body. i can not digest food normally. my body takes more in when i eat beacuse its use to being hungery so it stores more than i need meaning i gain more weight. so i can gain 5 pounds in a day or two and lose them just the same. im still suffering from this everyday. and everyday its a stuggle not to give in. i know i will give in agin, but im hoping eventually i will get my self in a safe place.

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